Hit the Road, Hack

Life Hacks are Old Hat. Is that all right, Jack?

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The concept of ‘life hacks’ turns everything into a matter of efficiency, and that kind of hacks me off. It perpetuates the notion that we aren’t doing things well enough, that we aren’t living life properly (whatever that means), or that we aren’t happy enough.

Admittedly, my jaw did drop when a reel taught me how to use a bobby pin correctly (i.e. the wavy side facing inward). Plus, I’d be lying if I denied the presence of a hair tie cum waistband expander in my right pocket at present. Some strangers on the internet do offer up surprisingly sound advice. The term ‘life hack’ might carry positive connotations for many, indicating clever and innovative solutions to problems. But, when used in isolation, ‘hack’ conjures images of TikTok facelifts and maths formulae etched into scientific calculator covers, at least for me.

What's the point
of hacking life?
Nay, you say
nay, grunt.
You hack me off.
Perfunctory
gestures
disappoint.

You Can’t Hack Your Passion

The discord is real. Passions and hacks are incompatible. In sentences comprising both ‘trust the process’ and ‘hack’, one term usually negates the other. The depth, authenticity and personal significance synonymous with true passions can’t be feigned. Passions entail processes that cannot be expedited whereas hacks are goal-oriented. I used to think that ‘a creative approach to problem-solving’ in job adverts was cool. Now I read it as ‘can make a tough job look easy on a shoestring budget’ or ‘can hack the work’. Tricks and quick wins just do not mix well with passions. If you disagree, go and strike up a conversation with your nearest friendly artist.

Hacking a Language

It is possible to hack foreign language learning… if you’re results-focused. If you have a short-term language learning goal, a few shortcuts, tips and tricks can help you learn the basics, or brush up on some rusty knowledge. You might want to impress the locals on an upcoming trip, read street signs, or simply check that the meal you want to order is vegetarian and that you and the waiter agree on the definition of ‘meat’! In these cases, you could learn basic greetings and other relevant vocabulary, practise some role-play dialogues, and store anything else in the notes app on your phone. When your trip is over, you’ll probably forget a lot of the phrases you used and won’t lament this too much. Your learning will have probably served a very specific and short-term purpose.

If your language learning goals are broader, hack-centric methods might just hold you back. You risk getting stuck at a superficial level, neglecting complex cultural aspects of languages and even perpetuating stereotypes. There really isn’t a cheat code to skip to the boss level. Effort, commitment, resilience, and a distinct lack of ego will be needed. Plus, taking the scenic route is often more fulfilling in its own right. You can, indeed, use smaller hacks to achieve smaller goals which, when amassed, might lead you to the realm of language proficiency. Chat GPT can produce a helpful language learning schedule for you, but it cannot make you stick to it. You can use mnemonics to remember verb conjugations or distinguish between homophones, four [sic] example. However, no one tip or trick will unlock language proficiency. If you’re passionate about achieving a level of fluency that allows you to communicate without relying on set phrases and written prompts, a mindset shift might be the only ‘hack’ you need. There is no shortcut through which you can circumvent effort and become fluent.

Questo è tutto quello che ho. [That’s all I have].

I hope there are no hacky looks incoming!

TL;DR: Some hacks are good, some are bad. If you hack your passion, you might become sad.